Not To Be Trusted With Knives

{September 28, 2006}   Less than a day!

There is less than a day to bid on my fabulous auction! Go there! Go there now!

{September 27, 2006}   Dr. Beth, the 5ft tall supermodel

Late last month, I received an email from my Faculty stating that they were looking for grad students to model for photos to be used in the Faculty‘s new grad program brochures. Those of us brave enough to respond were set up for photo shoots. What we actually ended up doing in the photos depended on the time we were available and where the photographer was scheduled to be at that time. So I give you, Beth the Plant Scientist!

A few points of note:

  • doesn’t it look like the corn is really tall, since it is taller than me? And you can’t tell from these photos that I’m only 5 ft tall*?
  • despite the fact that I know next to nothing about botany, doesn’t that last picture look like I am really, really interested in examing this plant? Perhaps getting that Drama minor paid off after all…

*or as one person referred to me the other day, a 5.0


{September 26, 2006}   And the plot thickens…

So, I’m watching ET Canada* and the first story is about how Tie Domi’s wife has listed Tie having an affair with Belinda Stronach on her divorce papers!** All I can say is ewwwwww!

Leanne Domi

Belinda Stronach Tie Domi

OK, I guess the other thing I can say is, “how does he tell them apart?”

Oh ya, and in my googling for photos for this posting, I came across this pic, which I totally had to share with y’all. Yup, this blog is nothing if not classy.

*Don’t look at me like that. It comes on after the news and I had left the TV on. I was watching the news, dammit!

** and you had heard it here first!

I’ve been looking for a copy of The Heathen’s Guide to World Religions ever since I lost the custody battle for the copy I used to sort of own*. Chapter’s, the liars, have been claiming that this book is “temporarily unavailable to order” since the beginning of time. I’ve searched used bookstores all across Vancouver. I’ve searched online bookstores. I even googled the author, William Hopper, and the publishing company, Diogenes Press, in hopes of contacting them to see if they have a few copies of this book lying around that I could purchase. All to no avail. Until now.

Somehow, out of the blue, Anonymous posted a comment on a recent posting of mine (which had nothing to do with The Heathen’s Guide to World Religions whatsoever) that merely said, “” And lo and behold, you can buy the book there! I highly, *highly* recommend this book to anyone interested in the history of the major religions**. How can you not like a book that is dedicated to Mother Teresa, who had me forcibly removed after I was introduced to her; and some guy who punched me in the face for Jesus“?

And, as an added bonus, the author has a blog too. Which he appears to have started on September 4, 2006. I love the irreverent way this guy writes and I’m definitely adding this one to my blog roll. I’m telling you, get in on the ground floor on this blog everyone!

Thanks Anonymous!***

*OK, so there wasn’t *actually* a battle. A skirmish. With light sabres. But not really a “battle” per se.

**This is a new and expanded version, compared to the version I used to sort of own. And I’ve very excited to see what’s been added.

***Anonymous – you should totally come out and tell us who you are and take credit for your find! Or am I the only attention whore on this blog?

{September 25, 2006}   It’s a Beautiful Day

Damn, it was a beautiful day in Vancouver. Despite it really looking like winter* had arrived, to the point that I had actually gone and bought myself a rain jacket, summer decided to have a last hurrah and it was gorgeous and sunny today. So wonderful that I actually went out into the nonline world. I decided to go for a run, even though Sundays are usually a day off. And I decided to make it a longer run than I usually do. And then when I got back to my place, I still felt like running, so I just kept running past my place and added a few extra blocks, just for kicks. The day was just so beautiful and the running was exhilirating. I ran past kids playing soccer. And adults playing ultimate. And people running and biking and going for a walk in Pacific Spirit Park. And the grass was green, the sky blue and the mountains were gorgeous. And I kept thinking, “Man, it is great to be alive.”

Another reason why it is great to be alive**:

I wanted to put a pic of this wicked cheesecake I made this weekend here, but my computer is refusing to recognize the digital camera. Stupid computer. So just imagine that there is a pic of a beautiful chocolate swirled cheesecake (about half of which is gone) here, okay? I’ll put the pic up if my computer ever stops hating me.

And another.

P.S. Since I started this posting before midnight, I still have time to say, “Happy birthday Jason!

*We don’t really have autumn in Vancouver. We have summer (sunny) and winter (rainy). I guess the day we have a big windstorm and all the leaves fall off the trees at once can be considered our “fall” season.

**This is a cheesecake*** that I made. A chocolate Amaretto cheesecake. With organic, dark chocolate. And agar instead of gelatin****.

***I didn’t eat all of it by myself. But I did eat a lot. Which may explain where I got sooo much energy to go running today!

***Gelatin is full of skin/bone/hoofy badness. Yuck. Agar is full of seaweedy goodness and reminds me of being in the lab. Mmmm… agar.

{September 23, 2006}   Way Out Auctions

Check it out – I’m on Way Out Auctions – a site dedicated to the strange, weird, and wild things on eBay! Can’t find me? I’m located right between the evil Jesus doll and the bottle of triple blessed holy water. And I’m pleased to say that I’m currently at a much higher bid than either of those fine products.

The current bid is US$17.50. And to be quite honest, I’m quite curious to know who this high bidder, thayanis, is… I guess only time will tell.

Strangely, the counter on my auction seems to have reset itself. I had over 180 on the counter at one point, and when I checked back it was at 3. Weird. It’s back up to 25, so I guess I’m pushing 200 actual people having viewed it (as I’m assuming that some of those 25 were part of the original 180+). And you still have 5.5 days to bid – bid now, bid often!

On a completely unrelated note, the NHL preseason has started. And, in each of his first two starts as a Canuck, Roberto Luongo let in the first shot of the game, both times. Oh yes, I think Luongo is going to fit right in with the ‘nucks!

{September 22, 2006}   I Take Candy From Strangers

Just went on a little shopping excursion. I went for a run in the rain the other day, for which I had to borrow my roommate’s rain jacket, since I don’t have a proper rain jacket. And it reminded me “hey, I live in Vancouver! It rains here sometimes!” So off I went to MEC to buy me a rain jacket. I got a nice one that was on sale (yay!) and when I was at the checkout, the clerk was offering chocolate to her co-worker… and then she offered me a piece. Now, she may have just been being polite, but who am I to turn down chocolate? If I end up poisoned, you all will know what happened.

eBay update:

At last check 155 people had checked out my posting and there are 5 bids! In truth, I hadn’t expected anyone to actually bid on it, so it’s pretty cool that I will actually make my money back. And I’ve been told that the real bidding starts in the last few hours…

{September 19, 2006}   Coolest thing EVER on eBay

You totally have to check out the coolest thing that’s been posted for sale on eBay.

Coolest. Thing. EVER.

Click here!

OK, I’ll give you a hint:

Photo by Danielle.

Check it out! Tell all of your friends! Blog about it! Shout it from the rooftop! I want to see how many people I can get to check it out. Seriously. You know you want to.

Update: Within half an hour of posting this on eBay, someone had already bid on it! You better act fast if you want to bid! 😉

{September 19, 2006}   All Hail the Interweb!

Damn, I love the interweb. Only on this information superfreeway can you find such fine products as this:

Click here for details on what this actually is. And props to Jason* for bringing this product to my attention.

Also found on the webernet:

Click here for the whole collection of X-ray sex pics**.

Good times. Good times.

*Jason, I’m pretty sure you are going to hell. I’ll meet you there.

**Along with some other weird stuff. If anyone can tell me what the weird contraption in the other photos is, please enlighten me!

{September 15, 2006}   Not To Be Outdone….

… apparently Belinda Stronach, not to be outdone by Peter and Condi, is now making headlines because she is (possibly) dating…. Tie Domi? wtf?

I think she just wanted some air time on my blog.

{September 14, 2006}   MacKay Update

OK, so I just watched the news at noon and the reporter referred to Peter MacKay as “a hunk.” I’m pretty sure that is a sign of the apocalypse.

{September 14, 2006}   Random Ramblings

So I went to an Aggie dinner tonight. Despite being an Aggie for 6 years and never having gone to an Aggie dinner while I was actually a student, I went to one tonight. It was a lot of fun – there were a tonne of people helping out making the dinner. Plus, if you help out making the dinner, you get to eat for free. Which is important when you are unemployed, ur, between jobs… yes, that sounds better.

After dinner, a bunch of us decided to go down to the beach. We got some wood to make a fire. Lugged it all the way to the beach. Then it started to rain. So we abandoned our plan – which was really good because by the time we got back to the Aggie building, it really started to pour down. Sigh. I think it may be autumn now.

So, to remind me of more summery times, I give you this pic of me and my neice, taken when I was visiting Toronto in June:

Isn’t she a cutie pie? Wouldn’t we make a great ad for Tim Horton’s?

OK, what else… ah yes, Lukas won Rockstar: Supernova. wOOt! I didn’t want to mention it on here before because whenever I cheer for anyone, they inevitably lose*, but I’ve been watching Supernova for the past few weeks and I totally wanted Lukas to win. And, I will admit it, it is in large part because he’s Canadian. I thought that all of the final four were really good. Oh dear, god, I can’t believe I’m blogging about a reality show. I really need to get a job.

Anson Carter, former Canuck on the Brothers Line, signed with the Columbus Bluejackets today. Boo-urns for Anson Carter. Why, oh, why did you ask for sooo much money to sign with the Canucks? Now you have to go and live in Ohio.

And, um, did I read this correctly. Foreign Affairs Peter McKay being referred to as “eye candy”?? Condi Rice is going after Belinda Stronach‘s sloppy seconds??

So I got a webcam from my friend Rachel and I can’t for the life of me make it work! The computer seems to detect the webcam when I plug it into the USB port, but the software doesn’t seem to recognize it. And I’ve tried a few different software programs that it should work with, but no dice. Other things work in the USB ports, except the digital camera that I sometimes use, which used to work in the USB port, but now doesn’t. Stupid computers.

On a more serious note, can you believe this shooting rampage in Montreal? Two of my cousins go to Dawson College, so I called my aunt to make sure they were OK, which they were (thank goodness). Both of them were at school at the time and one was just on her way in and heard the gunshots as she was going into the atrium… and everyone just started running. I can’t even imagine how terrifying that must have been. And I really can’t get my head around what would make someone do something like this. It’s just so senseless.

*see Canucks and Senators

{September 12, 2006}   Happy Birthday Daav!

Today is Dave’s birthday.

So I thought I’d write a little tribute to Dave.

Dave is the reason that I started blogging. Dave sends me links to funny cartoons. Dave has two of the cutest and most fun cats I’ve ever met. Dave knows how to mix a mean rum & diet Coke. Dave shows up on my messenger all drunk and slurring* incoherently about his latest creation and how I need to join it. Dave flew all the way here in April just to, along with his wife, keep me from having a breakdown when my professional life all but imploded. Dave wrote such funny summaries of our adventures that I didn’t need to blog that whole week! And if all that weren’t enough, Dave is also the editor of a wicked awesome literary journal called Armada. If you haven’t already, you need to go check this out – it rocks!**

In truth, Dave is like any man, only moreso.

Happy Birthday Dave!

*if you don’t think it’s possible to slur in print form, you obviously haven’t chatted with Daav and Jogre when they are drunky drunky.

**Dave, I’m sure you thought that I hadn’t pimped Armada yet because I was just totally lame, but honestly I wanted to wait for a special occasion… everyone else pimped it right away, but I wanted to bring it up just when you thought I’d forgotten to do it. And so from now you have to refer to me as your BFF! No wait, as Dr. BFF!

{September 11, 2006}   Run for the Cure

Remember back in May when I said I was going to find a nice 5 or 10K race to run in (after watching the Vancouver Marathon and feeling like a total slacker)? As I footnotedly predicted, that idea didn’t last too long. But the idea has re-surfaced! Danielle told me about the “Run for the Cure,” which raises funds for the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation. And this time, rather than thinking about it for awhile and talking myself out of it, I’ve signed up! My goal is to raise $150 – a modest amount, but it’s the level at which I don’t have to pay the $35 registration fee. And it is for a really good cause! So if you are thinking about giving money for breast cancer research (if even if you weren’t thinking of it, but are now), please visit my donations page and make a donation online to help me raise my $150:

My donation page

The race is on October 1st, 2006, so I only have 21 days to train! But I have been running (although not as regularly as I would like) and done some hikes recently, so I’m hoping that signing up for this race will be the motivation I need to keep up with the program!

{September 10, 2006}   Weekend of Weirdness

Remember when I said that guys don’t hit on you on public transportation here in Vancouver like they do in Toronto? Well, we can scratch that off the list of differences between here and there. I was transferring from one bus to another yesterday morning and this guy totally starts chatting me up. He’s all like “I saw you on the other bus and I was trying to get your attention.” And then “You are a pretty lady.” OK, calling me a “pretty lady,” strike one*. Then he offers me a cigarette. Strike two. He asks me where I’m going and I say, “Home.” Now, I chose to say this in an attempt to convey the message: “hey, it’s 10:30 am on a Saturday and I wasn’t at home last night. Thus, I have someone’s place to be at during the night. The role is filled, no need to apply.**” But apparently dude takes this to mean “Hey, I go home with randoms!” He actually leans over and pretends to try looking into my bag and says, “Do you have another change of clothes in there to spend another night out?” Ick! Strike three, four, five and six!!! Then he asks what time it is and I tell him and he’s like, “Do you want to get some lunch?” “No thanks.” “How about coffee?” “No.” What I should have said was, “Not on your life Mr. Can’t-Take-A-Hint! Take your cigarettes and go far far away from here!!” He then proceeded to ask me two more times while we were on the bus if I wanted to go for coffee. wtf? So, long story short, apparently people in Vancouver will hit on your on public transportion, but subway station*** of the gods it is not.

In the continuing weirdness of the weekend, I went to a party at a farm and you won’t believe what happened. The party was fine – there was barbeque, beer, music, everyone loved my 7-layer bean dip****, Gwen made the best pie I’ve EVER had (and I don’t even like pie! But this pie was made with blackberries that were picked *right there*)! Those of us who stayed ’til the end of the party unpacked our sleeping bags and went off to sleep in various rooms of the main building. During the night a white van drove into the compound and one of the girls woke up when some guys entered the building – she checked on it and it turned out to be Security, doing their patrol. They got in passed the locked gate, and into the locked building and were wearing Security uniforms. OK, fair enough. So my friend goes back to sleep. When we get up in the morning, the speakers from the sound system that had been rented for the party were gone. And it turned out that the lock on the gate had been cut. Fortunately the mixer (which is worth a lot more than the speakers) was in a room where people were sleeping, so it wasn’t taken. Even more fortunately, these people who dressed up as security guys to rob us weren’t crazed psycho killers — it’s rather frightening to know that they into the building where we were all sleeping! What the heck is this world coming to??

*actually, truth be told, strikes 1-3 were pretty much covered by his not being hot.
**and quite frankly, it’s none of his business where I’m going, right?
***or bus stop, as the case may be.
****but really, who can resist 7-lay bean dip?

et cetera