Not To Be Trusted With Knives

{August 1, 2008}   Why Couldn’t It Have Been Gummy Octopi?

I was in Shopper’s Drug Mart earlier today and saw gummy tarantulas.  Seriously. A big clear plastic tub filled with 8 legged gummies, complete with cartoony looking spiders on the label.  I wanted to take a picture of it to put on my blog to say “This freaks me out!”

But I couldn’t do it.

Sure the picture on the label was so cartoony that you could have told me that it was an octopus, I would have went “Cute! An octopus!”  But it didn’t say “gummy octopi” on that label, it said “gummy tarantulas”1. And so I’m totally freaked out. To that point that I couldn’t even stay in that aisle.  Gah!

1Even typing that word sends a chill up my spine.

Dan says:

As a fellow arachnophobe, I thank you for not photographing the freakish little demons (even if they are in gummy form).

Seriously, why would someone want to eat one of them (even if they are in gummy form)? They are gross and evil and wicked. And they know I hate them and are out to get me. And no, I’m not paranoid.

Jodi says:

there is no way I could stick a spider in my mouth. gummy or otherwise.

Matt says:

When I was a kid, a family friend gave me and my brother each a gummy rat as a travelling gift. They were big — about half the length and girth of a real rat.

The black gummy rat seemed innocuous enough as I took it out of the clear plastic wrapper, but after I bit its gummy head off, and looked down at its shiny black neck stump, I was so nauseated that I couldn’t even swallow the bite I’d just taken, and had to spit it out.

Some things just shouldn’t be made into candy.

Dan says:

@Matt ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Kalev says:

I just find it SO odd that you are actually phobic of spiders. Like I don’t like them but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t need to leave the aisle the gummy tarantulas were found in. And I’m sure I could take a picture of them. So anyway, thank you for helping me to understand what people mean when they talk about “phobias” because yeah, that’s totally irrational. 😛

I had to look them up. Here are some I found (in a link to protect the terrified): gummi tarantulas

Now I have to say, I have NO idea why anyone would make candy in spider form. I am by no means a fan of spiders and spider candy seems… pretty wrong.

Beth says:

@Kalev – Leave it to you to provide the link!

@Chris – Seems like there must be better things for your tooth health than sticky, sugary gummies! And besides, gummy spiders are made with pure evil, not with xylitol.

Kalev says:

@Beth: I merely provide people with what they crave.

chris says:

@Beth: It seems logical. But I just provided the link; someone else did the research. 😉

Raul says:

Dr. Beth.

You know I love you, right? But I am SO sorry, even though I am an arachnophobe, I *love* gummy spiders. You can hate me now 🙂

Beth says:

How can you be an arachnophobe, yet put gummy spiders IN YOUR MOUTH?? Does. Not. Compute.

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