Not To Be Trusted With Knives











{February 17, 2008}   Dildos in Texas

So I just saw over on Feministing.com that a federal appeals court has overturned a Texas law banning the sale of sex toys. This video1explains a number of the rules that Texas had about sex toys:

Highlights include:

  • You could buy a dildo, but only as long as you didn’t call it a dildo. You could only have it for “educational purposes” – such as using it to demonstrate how to put on a condom.
  • You could buy a vibrator, but only as long as you didn’t call it it a vibrator. It’s a “personal massager.”
  • You could buy a butt plug. And you could even call it a butt plug because, and I quote: “The anus is not defined as a sexual organ by Texas law. So you can buy whatever you like to go there.”

Which, of course, makes me wonder if they ever sold the baby Jesus butt plug in Texas.

1For some reason, WordPress keeps eating the embed code when I try to embed this video in this posting. Even though I’m sure the code is correct. So, I’ve given up and now all y’all2 will have to click on the link to see the video.
2I said “all y’all” ‘cuz this is blog posting about Texas.

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Stacia says:

Having lived in Texas for many years, I can assure you that you can indeed buy sex toys of any variety. Not that I did, um, but I KNOW people who did. People who weren’t me.



Beth says:

LOL! You are awesome, Stacia! Did the store where the, uh, people who aren’t you have to call them “demonstrator models” and “personal massagers” instead of sex toys?



Those rules beg a further question:

* Can one buy a, uh, anus-specific vibrator?

Maybe only if you branded it as a personal mASSager. You could keep it in your hipster vinyl mASSager bag.

Apologies for being juvenile. I’m living in a conservative country, and need an outlet (insert plug-in vibrator joke here).



Beth says:

@Darren – My guess would be that you could, since “the anus is not defined as a sexual organ” in Texas. I wonder if you could buy OhMiBod, the vibrator, ur, personal massager that attaches to your iPod…



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