Not To Be Trusted With Knives

{January 5, 2008}   One Missed Movie

This Margaret Cho vehicle had such promise – remakes of J-horrors usually scare the bejesus out of me. The Ring gave me nightmares1. The Grudge freaked me the fuck out as well. One Missed Call – oh how I wish it had been One Missed Movie.

There were definitely a few points where this movie made me jump2. But overall it was just cheesy. Cheesy cheesy cheesy. And plot holes. And did I mention the cheesiness? I’m sooo glad this was a free sneak preview and that I didn’t actually have to pay for this. I cannot stress this enough – even for a free movie, it was not worth the price of admission.

What the hell was Margaret Cho thinking when she agreed to be in this movie? Did she lose a bet? I bet she lost a bet.

1Yes, that’s nightmares, plural.
2And, at one point, scream. But that was totally because Kalev screamed and scared me. Which he will now add a comment to deny and say that I screamed first, but it’s totally not true.

Kalev says:

She SO totally screamed first. She’s a girl, after all. It’s not like I watch all horror movies from behind my sweater and with my fingers in my ears.

Kalev says:

I love you neglect to mention you were DELIRIOUSLY desperate to see this movie since we saw the preview for it probably nearly half a year ago… oh we HAVE to see that, you would say. Meanwhile I was like, no, no we really don’t…

Darren says:

You had me until “Margaret Cho vehicle” (which would have to be an SVU…thank you, I’ll be here all week, try the veal). Unless I haven’t been paying attention, she doesn’t exactly have a storied career in cinema, does she?

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