Not To Be Trusted With Knives











{January 3, 2006}   Acknowledgements

So, as I wait for my supervisor to read through my latest draft, I’m putting together the little odds & ends that need to go into the thesis, one of which is the acknowledgements section. You know, the part where you thank everyone you’ve ever met and suck up to your committee in the hopes that they won’t ask you too many hard questions during the defence. I want to have a nice quotation at the start of my acknowledgements — something to catch people’s attention and that will make me look well read, lest anyone think I’ve spent 5+ years buried in my lab (which I pretty much have) and have no culture (which I don’t). But after hours of Googling, I couldn’t find any good quotations. I found a whole bunch of totally inappropriate quotations that I’d love to put in there but don’t have the balls to.

Some quotations I think it would be most inappropriate to use at the start of my thesis include:

A theory is something nobody believes, except the person who made it. An experiment is something everybody believes, except the person who made it-Albert Einstein (that’s right, I don’t believe a thing I’ve written in this thesis — but I hope you do!)

An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
— Niels Bohr (
I hope you enjoy this thesis — it’s a compliation of all the mistake that I’ve made.)


Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one’s living at it.-Albert Einstein (dear god, what have I gotten myself into?)

Great ideas often receive violent opposition from mediocre minds-Albert Einstein (go ahead, I dare you to violently oppose my thesis)

As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life – so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls. -M. Cartmill

The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving. -Russell Green (Umm, why do I have a feeling that I’m always going to be poor?)

I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way. -Mark Twain (please ignore any typos in this thesis!)

If the facts don’t fit the theory, change the facts. — Albert Einstein (all facts in this thesis are Einstein-approved)

When you steal from one author, it’s plagiarism; if you steal from many, it’s research. — Wilson Mizner (I hope you enjoy my “research”)

Physics is like sex. Sure, it may give some practical results, but that’s not why we do it.” (Dr. Richard P. Feynman, American physicist) (if only I was getting a degree in physics!)

So, does anyone out there have a suggestion of a good quotation I could use?

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